‘RHONY’ just isn’t the same if you’re not guzzling bottles of wine (specifically, Ramona’s pinot), is it? I mean, there’s not much point if you’re not cliiiiipping all of your gal pals and swirling your arms around like some sort of deranged music conductor by the end of it, ala Dorina style.
That’s why I came up with the Totally Legit RHONY Drinking Game™. Grab your favourite gal pals, get a season ready to binge, and get that vino at the ready…
The drink, of course, is up to your discretion, but for the full authentic experience I recommend the Skinny Girl margerita or Ramona’s pinot. We specifically do not condone drinking Tipsy Girl, because that’s a cheater brand! Got your drinks? Good, let’s get started.
- Every time Ramona’s famous crazy eyes make an appearance. (If your eyes aren’t as wild by the end of this drinking game, I’ve failed you)..
- Every time Heather smiles so wide it looks as though her mouth is going to turn her head inside out..
- Whenever Carole wears something that’s a crime against fashion itself and makes you feel a hella lot better about your own style. .
- Every time Bethenny says something deeply cutting (but deeply hilarious). .
- Whenever Dorinda acts like a drunken slob kebab (… and another when she denies it)..
- Take a shot whenever Sonja gets naked (intentionally or not)..
- Whenever Ramona acts like she’s running a totalitarian empire, dishing out orders to the poor staff member who just wants the crazy rich white lady to stop screaming about pinot grigio.
- When Luann mentions any of the following things: cabaret, Tom, or class.
- Whenever Aviva or Jill start a fight for literally no reason what-so-ever..
- If Ramona hosts a new me/new year/new changes party. Or apologises.
And then continues to be a ****..
- Whenever Kelly mentions/eats jelly babies or lollipops like some sort of possessed, NYC-road-running demon.
- Whenever Alex goes redder than the surface of Mars, ideally when yelling at Jill..
- Every time Bethenny plugs Skinny Girl. (Girl, we get it. And no, we don’t wanna buy your jeans)..
- Whenever Tinsley, Ramona or Sonja attempt to flirt with a male and you want the sun come crashing down into the Earth because you just can’t handle it anymore. /
- Whenever the cast treat poor, underrated Jules awfully for literally no reason what-so-ever. (“My dad’s dying.” “They called me a slut, can you believe it?”)..
- Whenever you can tell that B would rather be rubbing poison ivy over her eyelids than take part in one more scene with these ridiculous women. (Bonus points if it’s with Heather)...
- Whenever Ramona mispronounces something...
Aaaand that’s it – the ‘RHONY’ drinking game, hand-crafted with love and care, suited to match your Bravo binging needs perfectly. Whack on an episode, and get guzzling.
For more on the Real Housewives of New York City, go to… my post about why Bethenny Frankel is an absolute BOSS.
Disclaimer: Obviously I don’t encourage drinking to this degree, or actually attempting to do this “game” – it’s all made in jest and not to be attempted IRL. Honestly, you’d get alcohol poisoning with this bunch of loons, so let’s not even go there, ‘kay?.